Die if ya do

Don’t wanna do nothin’ new,

Wanna sit here and take an antacid

Keep your evil salad,

Wanna eat cake and feel a bit flaccid,

Don’t challenge my opinions, or ask me to do anythiiiiiiing!

‘Cos if you tip up my boat, I’ll just not bother to swiiiiiim

Yeah! Leave me to rot, I just cannot change my world view!

No, no, no, no, no

I hate everyone, and nobody’s gonna get throuuuuuugh

Chorus

‘Cos I’ll die if ya do, die if ya do, if the stroke don’t get me

I’ll have a heart attack on you

Die in your kitchen, die in your car,

You think you’re goin’ somewhere but you will not get far

Burst a blood vessel all over the seats,

To carry me out, you’ll have to stain all your sheets.

Leave me alone, or you’ll be sorry as hellllllllllllll

Don’t wanna learn nothin’

Wanna sit here watchin’ Hitler instead,

I hate richer people, and I hate poor sick people in bed,

You can keep all your herbs, and your superfood too,

Nothin’s gonna help me, or my sore, sore head

Gonna wear my dark glasses, and sit here in pain,

Anything you’re gonna try, you’re gonna try it in vain,

There’s nothin’ you can do, so you might as well eat some cake toooooo

‘Cos I’ll die if ya do, die if ya do.  Diabetes ain’t got me, but it’s gonna get you

Die in your bathroom, die in your hall

Nothing you can do to help me at all

I’ll sit here in my armchair, watching Nazi vids

Hating everybody, soon you’ll be on the skids

Laughing at misfortune, smiling full of hate

Nothing you can say is gonna clean up my plate

Give me more cake, or I’ll trip you up on the stairs,

Then I’ll laugh my head off, burst an arteryyyyy,

Bleed over the antiques and hid my head on a shelllllf

There’s nothin’ you can do, you broke your ankle when I tripped you upppppp,

No, no, no

Cos’ I’ll die if ya do, die if ya do,

Bleed everywhere forever, make a mess outta you,

You’ll feel like you’ve been cruel, feel like you’ve been bad

Nothing’s gonna help you feel any less sad,

Skull fragments in the garage, in the studio,

Dead body in the garden maybe on the patio,

Blood in the pink roses, in the pussy willow

You’ll need a full squad just to move me real slow

Ya know, it’s much easierrrr

If ya just give me the caaaaaaaake,

Yeah, yeah,

Even though I’ll die if ya do, die if ya do,

Give me all the cake, else I’ll complain about you

Black forest gateau, strawberry cheesecake.

You can keep your evil veggies and the spooky fruit too,

Take the herbs and grass away

Take the raw chocolate too,

Give me all the cake or I’ll complain about you.

Deep fried potato, a gallon of milk

The pains in my stomach are something else too,

Don’t force me to live, don’t ask me to think

I’ll just throw up my fries in your nice new clean sink.

I’ll pretend I’m not tired, pretend I’m not sick,

No I don’t want no smoothie it looks way too thick.

Don’t force me to do anythiiiiiing……

Cos’ I’ll die if ya do, die if ya do,

Collapse in the lounge, or in your nice tidy loo,

Rigor Mortis in your doorway, stiff limbs on your floor

Put your pedal to the metal getting right out the door.

Give me all the cake, and all the fries too,

Oily mayonnaise, salty sausage and ham

I’ll eat what I want, and it’s better if you eat the cake toooooooo

Don’t challenge my opinions, or you know what I’ll do to youuuuuu

Yeah, yeah, yeah

Die if ya do, die if ya do

Won’t pay attention to your views, won’t listen to you,

I just wanna moan, wanna complain too

Wanna eat some more cake, and take some painkillers too

Blood quality’s for sissies, and for dumb hippies too,

Wanna complain until midnight and then after that too.

Give me back my Hitler, my antacid world view,

Life is too short, and I don’t want a mess,

Don’t challenge my opinions or make me wear a dress,

Fetch me my slippers, and some more kaolin,

My plan is to expire over your violin.

You’ll be tidying up my fluids

Mopping up my blood,

But at least I’ll have eaten some more of that food.

The post Die if ya do (song, think Dixie Chix) appeared first on Ina Disguise – Author.

Poop and beauty – the awful truth

Continuing on my health series of posts, you can find the rest in the tag cloud if you haven’t been following them, here is the awful truth about beautiful skin.  You need to devote yourself to producing better quality poop.

I realise that this did not work for Gillian McKeith, the queen of poop, however she had the disadvantage of several generations of poverty stricken Scots in her family.  For premium quality poop, you might want to consider someone with more fat in their diet.

The mid section of the face gives your age away faster than anything.  Many young people have double chins, eyebags, drooping flesh due to poor diet and habits, but when you actually do age, there is a tiny difference in the rate of droop which makes it easy to tell what age you actually are.  I had no idea until I went raw that this was a question of what you are putting in your mouth.  Eye bags and double jowls are actually optional for most of us.  In extreme cases, you find people with genetic eye bags and jowls, but I am fortunate in having a good example in the case of my mother that this is not necessarily the case.  After her stroke, the physiotherapist actually asked how she had managed her looks, she was so different from the rest of the patients in the geriatric stroke ward.

“Gentle walking for an hour a day and eating chocolate behind a newspaper.” I laughed.  My father, the health nut, did not enjoy nearly as good health as my mother has in her dotage.  Little and often applies to exercise as much as it does diet.

As I have said before, dairy is largely responsible for the tell tale middle section of your face.  I am not going to condemn dairy entirely, but as with fruit, it needs to be accompanied with a large quantity of vegetable fibre for your body to process it quickly enough. Thanks to the raw period, I am aware that I can eradicate this unpleasant area, and at my age, it is important that I do not let it hang around as the next decade will establish the permanent record of my mismanagement.

So, welcome to the advanced class in terms of transitioning your diet.  I had to explain this to Twisty, a former nurse, as he had always been informed that firm stools were desirable.  Those transitioning from a normal diet will find this part of your raw journey quite shocking, but it is entirely manageable.

The F Plan diet, a dry and unpleasant way of using bran to increase the fibre in your diet in order to lose weight, popular in the early 1980s, had it partially right, but nobody was drinking enough water back then, and frankly flax is better than bran due to the nutrient content.  Your poop is not meant to be firm at all.  Your poop, in fact, should be at dropping consistency, similar to cake mix.  Going raw, or partially raw, helps with this enormously due to the fibre and water content but for the ultimate in high quality poop, I choose to go with Supermix.

The Supermix that I make, which is peculiar to my range of issues, is formulated for quality blood, quality poop, weight loss, high nutrient content and bowel health.  Twisty can now testify that it does not process the same way as normal food does at all, and the effects are immediate.  Instead of one bowel movement a day, you quickly go to three or more, which is exactly what you want to do for translucent skin and a healthier system generally.  I choose not to waste it if I am having a normal food phase, so I like to have a very healthy diet happening before I start.  This way it is not quite as big a surprise that I have to visit the loo five times a day instead of one to three.

Any female beauty, especially those known for great skin, is aware that a slow digestive system dulls your skin, makes you fat and generally takes your energy down by several notches, but nobody tells you about this rather unglamorous aspect of maintaining your looks.  It is important to stay hydrated, and it is just as important to encourage a speedy digestive system.  Exercise helps with this, but in the absence of your motivation or ability to get out more, or simply because you want fast results, speedy food is extremely helpful.

You can easily do the research and make a supermix to suit yourself, as mine has 80 ingredients and is formulated for me personally. When you get to the point in your raw journey and exploration where you are ready to try something more advanced, it is well worth putting in some reading time to do it yourself.  Otherwise, mind your poop if you want to look your best and most beautiful. Your mood will also improve, which is probably more important than looking in the mirror in terms of beauty.

Three weeks on ten a day

This is an update for the following series of posts.  Sorry but the blog format insists on the giant boxes.

Two days of ten a day

Two weeks on ten a day

We are entering the third week now, and my appetite is now back under control to the point that I do not have to worry so much about making it to ten a day.  Ten a day is a struggle at first, especially for people who try to go raw quickly.  Composting was something that bothered me for the first few weeks the first time I did it, but as I am wise to it now, I make sure some of the quota is lightly steamed (and I do mean lightly.  Sometimes I just mix the ingredients and heat at the last minute)

Composting is a slightly unpleasant vegetable burp you get if you transition quickly from normal food to raw food.  It is a minor inconvenience when you are aware of what you have to look forward to if you persist in telling your body to do what it is supposed to do – digest uncooked vegetable fibre.

The shingles treatment that I mentioned in the Antifungal, Antiviral post is working very well.  So outstandingly well in fact, that my hand pain has gone, my brain is clearer, even my limbs feel less fuzzy.  I still have the itch on my back, but it looks as if I got my diagnosis of ‘invisible shingles’ correct.  I also took a tablet for thrush, and although it has not completely cleared any trace of candidiasis, it is not at all as bad as it was.

My skin is recovering, and the odd pimple is appearing to excrete the traces of normal food.  The rash down the side of my face is almost gone. My hair is not quite recovering yet, but I am aware that this can take a few months, so I am not concerned.

I have so far dropped a size.  Yes, stuffing your face with vegetables is definitely a good plan, no matter who you are.  Better poop, better skin, better health.  Walking is less painful, breathing is easier, and I look younger. Bought myself some luxury dates and did not either want them, or the sugar free chocolate I like to make and keep so that I do not want any. (nowt queerer than folk)

Slightly more interested in sex than I have been for the last five years or so.  Not in actually doing it, but certainly noticing men more than I did, which can only be an indication of better health.

Starting on supermix now, so I will look a bit green for a week until my blood gets the message that good things are in regular supply again.

Remaining problems include getting rid of the breathing issue completely, tightness at the top of my legs, and the need to improve on sleep.

Hopefully this will encourage my sceptical readers to give it a go.

Ina

Antiviral, antifungal, Antibacterial

When I first bothered to attempt to resolve my health problems back in 2009, I coupled my raw food tendencies with four bulbs of garlic per day. Garlic is antibacterial, antiviral and antifungal. I normally use it as a sleeping pill, as garlic or oats are a safe bet if I want to be dead to the world for an extended period.  Usually, as I am looking after my mother, sleeping is not a particularly good idea if I want to achieve anything, so I tend to forget for months and even years. Now it is in my salad dressing, so I take it in conjunction with the rest of the holy trinity (chilli, ginger) and a host of other additions (wasabi, cider vinegar etc)

1000 year old recipe kills MRSA – here is an indication of how effective natural medicine can be.  We have actually made this, and reportedly it is very good for wounds and skin complaints, as well as being the ultimate in biofilm permeating surface cleaner.
Antiviral and antibacterial herbs
Antiviral, antifungal and antibacterial herbs

As you can probably guess, my problems do not stem from lack of knowledge, either of how to find information, or how to use it.  You have to care how you are to resolve your problems, so I was very interested in the depictions of extreme candida, and this article from the world of psychiatric care.

The role of antiviral therapy in Chronic Fatigue Treatment

So basically, the fungal and viral problems get worse because I am tired, therefore I get a bit depressed, therefore I no longer care about myself, therefore the whole thing gets much worse. If anything actually happens in the meantime, then my health takes a back seat. There are thousands, possibly millions of people who would benefit from a basic knowledge of how to use simple ingredients to avoid the slow, or sometimes fast decline in their immune system without having to resort to the doctor.

How to eliminate shingles quickly and naturally using alternative holistic methods

My dentist had had shingles in his mouth after a spell in hospital, which is the only reason my outbreaks ever got diagnosed, as my doctor did not know or care what this looked like.  Now I am aware what causes the tingling and exhaustion, it makes me more aware of the rashes.  A friend of mine was dismissed as having ‘minor’ athletes foot for several decades when he actually had an abnormally high instep and patches of astonishingly hard skin as a result, and I have appeared at several doctor’s surgeries with rashes all over my face, which remained unmentioned in the course of consultation because I was going for tiredness, which was laughed at as I have always worked at least 70 hours per week.

Rashes and athlete’s foot, in addition to the unpleasant experience of thrush or other complaints such as tingling, inflammation or numbness are not minor.  They are indications of systemic exhaustion, which can reach dangerous levels and cause far more serious complaints.  If you have any of these, you should look for solutions by other means in the absence of your doctor either wanting, or being able to treat them.

Your diet generally, therefore, is a lot more important than you would think.  Whilst many people may be entirely happy eating anything they want, a very large proportion of the population would benefit from making some improvements, particularly if they have ongoing ailments.

I am currently dealing with an ‘invisible’ case of shingles, and ongoing candidiasis, which attacks even if I eat badly only once, never mind for months. This indicates that I am battering my immune system. My circumstances, of looking after a large property and disabled mother mean that there are some things I cannot change, but you can bet that I am employing the means at my disposal to resolve the other problems.

Likewise, my mother’s dementia has been held back for 9 years now because I keep on top of minor ailments and provide her with a lot of stimulation in the form of trips out, tasks etc.  It is amazing what you can do about major problems by addressing the trivial things rather than ignoring them.  She gets far better care from me than I do, I am sorry to say.

For my overweight and/or aging readers, your tiredness is not all because of your weight, and your weight is not all because of your eating habits.  Think of your digestion as a drain, which becomes blocked by food which will not move.  Stop trying to explain this to your bemused doctor, and look for ways of resolving it. Yes, you.

Can you overdose on vitamins?

The overdose risk of vitamins

Safety with herbs

Today I am going to talk about supplements.  My father was spending a large amount monthly on herbal supplements in the 70s, so I have been around the colourful bottles a lot.  Both conventional doctors that we had until I was about 17 had conventional and homeopathic training, so we had quite a bit of advantageous knowledge to draw from.

There is, allegedly, no benefit to be derived from taking supplements.  Studies have indicated that people suffer from the same rates of illnesses towards the end of life whether they take supplements or not, so I look on supplements as a quality of life solution.  Basically, conventional medicine is for short term, and surgical purposes, and herbal medicine is for the sort of medium to long term ailment that doctors now like to ignore.  I am not just talking from a personal perspective, several friends have also noted the change in attitude to general health from doctors. My wealthier friend says that he was told by our mutual GP that he was considered worthwhile because he paid more tax.

This is not necessarily a bad thing.  You should regard your doctor as someone who provides medical solutions, and forget the idea that your doctor cares about your health.  Your health is your responsibility, so you should take it seriously.  I once had a chat with a young man who wanted his doctor to intervene with a small overhang of fat at his waistband.  I advised him to get a life.

Nevertheless, having seen the difference in treatment between me, my mother, random young men with self-inflicted injuries, (he won the medicine lottery) it is becoming apparent that with a lot of problems, you are on your own.  All these adverts and bits of advice saying to see your doctor about this or that are met with a blank stare if you actually try to talk to your GP about them.  I have reported symptoms of an impending or actual heart attack for a couple of decades of overwork and self neglect, and in that time only one doctor out of about 7 or 8 even bothered to have me checked out.  They will probably wait to post mortem me, and then say oooooooh look she had six heart attacks!

So, currently, as I am visibly slow when walking, have serious breathlessness and fatigue, headaches and a chest problem, I am trying to resolve it myself.  I have changed my diet to rid myself of toxin sitting around in my bowel, I am taking around fifteen times the recommended dose of Vitamin C, which I know is fine because I do not have the runs.  I look better, the chest problem has marginally improved, and my clothes are already starting to get big.  So far, so good.  I have procured some heart and lung support in the form of Forskohli, and I will be proceeding with some thyroid support in the form of seaweed.  All of this takes knowledge. It is wise to check on dosages, and it is also wise to make sure you know what is really wrong with you.

If it were not for the raw foodies, I would still be taking massive iron supplements on the advice of my doctor, and as you will see if you check, iron overdoses are particularly bad for you.  As it turned out after some raw foodism, I was just not absorbing the iron, and it was only when taking less traditionally iron rich foods, that the anaemia problem was cleared up.

My theory is that pharmaceutical knowledge imparted to medical doctors is not coupled with any genuine understanding of basic nutrition, or the effects of combining too much of one thing with another.  Hence my initial statement that conventional medicine is for short term, or surgical remedy, whilst you should really investigate everything else before you resort to chemical solutions.  My faith in the authority of the doctor started to erode once I discovered that they were not all as committed and well informed as my first conventional/homeopathic doctors.

An awful lot of conventional medical practioners are in it for the money, and at the end of the day, they are just people.  In the same way that you get a second opinion if someone tries to charge you too much for fixing your roof or car, you should try to get your own second opinion of what your doctor is saying where possible.

This new idea that has crept in, that even Twisty has been guilty of in the past, that medicine trumps wellbeing and alternative solutions, is completely at odds with the truth.  Many alternative solutions have been tried and tested over hundreds, and in some cases thousands of years.

The fact that no pharmaceutical company has paid to research it, because they don’t see it making them any money, is entirely meaningless.  If it makes you feel good, you try it, unless you are stupid enough to think that every problem fits into a tick box, prepared by someone with little to no knowledge of you, your lifestyle, your unreported symptoms.

It is also the case with the issue of detox – many doctors claim that this does not exist, and your liver and kidney does this more effectively than eating properly.  Your organs can quite easily be compromised by your poor habits, in which case they certainly do not. Your doctor is likely to be kept in this state of ignorance because without your poor diet and habits, you require less in the way of chemical medicine.  Commerce trumps well being.

Medicine has its place, but having argued with many a consultant that I actually worked with about its relationship with health, I am now in agreement with them that it is entirely separate. (they were also unaware that it was separate until I challenged them, incidentally!) Conventional medicine is a solution, it is not the solution.  Health is a separate thing, and it is nothing to do with your doctor, and everything to do with you.

Or even, not so young, free and obese.  Either is fine.

As you may or may not know from the health section of this blog, I have gained and lost over a thousand pounds of weight in the  course of my life. I do not eat entire cakes or packets of biscuits.  I do not have regular take-aways, and I have never liked chips.  The only thing I am inclined to eat far too much of is butter, and that is in conjunction with the consumption of bread or oatcakes.  The minute I rule out those two things, the problem is gone. My thinner sister of the same height regularly consumes more than I do, although as she is not being bullied by a pair of vindictive old women, she gets to leave the house now and again.

That being said, I have an emotional eating issue.  Sometimes whatever has happened seems very insignificant and I do not even want to discuss it, but the end result is the same.  I stand in the kitchen, out of sight and try to figure out a way of not thinking about it any more.  The easiest way to stop yourself talking, is to fill your mouth with food.  By far the easiest.

After years of being very successful on a wide variety of diets, I am going to save you a whole lot of research in the following few paragraphs.

Other people do not matter

Listening to other people’s opinions, or even seeking them out, is not going to get you anywhere.  Stop doing that.  If they are critical of whatever you are doing, just avoid them altogether.  This includes your family and closest friends.  Sometimes especially them. If they suggest that you are an embarrassment, or that you look terrible in your favourite t shirt, even if you do, leave them behind. Attitude is a lot sexier than a tiny waist, no matter what you are or are not wearing or doing. Concentrate on that.

Low Carbing

Low carbing is a good idea for the following reasons – if you maintain a low carb diet, you cut out simple carbohydrates such as wheat flour, sugar, potato, rice.  These are cheap filler items, which nutritionists are taught help you avoid bowel cancer, and are kept within generalised nutritional advice because the advisors on the Board of Nutrition are on the payroll of large food processing companies such as Mars, Kraft, and Coca Cola.  You are advised to eat them because these people know very well that they mess up your gut bacteria and keep you eating more of them.  Nobody is genuinely addicted to cheap chocolate, pizza, bread, fries or fizzy drinks.  If you try clearing the remains of what you have already eaten from your gut, you will soon find that you do not miss them at all.

You can achieve better avoidance of bowel cancer if you replace these things with more vegetables, and your bowel actually does a bit of vitamin extraction.  If you get rid of these things, you may also catch it early enough to avoid a lot of future fungal infections, cases of thrush etc.  My psoriasis, for example, only vanishes if I exclude everything apart from vegetables, grasses and seaweed.  Obviously this would be a struggle all the time, but it is now a managed situation, rather than something out of my control.

You do not need to eat meat

Having been a raw foodist, and settled on a non vegan version eventually, I have nothing against you eating meat, however, as someone from a country with generations of committed meat eaters, even I only really feel the need to eat fish or meat once every three weeks or so.  You certainly don’t need it every day, and you don’t even need it every week.  Too much of it sits in your system and rots, so be sparing and do not do it every day. This is another fallacy spread by the meat industry. If you do feel you must every day, make sure you balance it with twice as many vegetables as meat or fish.  Minimum.

The world is set up a certain way, you don’t need to be part of it

Sometimes the social difficulties of eating for your health are all too much, and you feel like giving up on yourself.  Don’t.  Just because everybody else can manage to eat off a normal menu and stuff a packet of crisps or whatever, down their throat without mishap, it doesn’t mean that you can.  Seriously.  I once put on almost two hundred pounds after trying for weeks to refuse to join one of my boyfriends in his love of pizza. It is that easy to mess up your gut bacteria, and end up craving all the things that made you ill before.  A person telling you to eat like them, and that all you have to do is eat less, does not understand your problem.

Step away from the computer

This is rich, coming from a confirmed geek like me, but I know how much easier it is to live your life through your keyboard.  If you are not careful, you will wake up after twenty years and wonder what happened.  You still feel the same, but the mirror tells you that you have just poured the best part of your life into a machine.  Take a month off it completely every year, leave your gadgets at home now and again, and see how much nicer your life is when you let yourself off the hook.

Cheese

Cheese can do you a lot of damage, although it is extremely tasty.  You can replace it with nutritional yeast, which tastes similar but does not feed the bad gut bacteria.  Eventually you will not miss it.  It causes eye bags and slows your digestion.  The name of the game, if you have a weight problem, is getting the food to move faster.  Twisty is able to eat whatever he wants and pretty much just think about losing weight to lose it, because his system works like a sports car.  If you have a weight problem, it is likely that yours works more like a tractor.  Do not eat slow moving food.

Calories

Calories are not all the same.  Ketogenic diets (see low carbing)  allow you to eat more than conventional diets and still lose weight, so if you are active, this is the first thing you should look at.  The hazard is that one mistake costs you whatever weight of glycogen your liver is storing, which in my case also causes all sorts of fluid problems. If anyone is telling you to portion control, and that you are just weak willed, please try to remember that a lot of your ‘hunger’ is actually caused by imbalance in processing, and if you can get this right, in the form of ridding yourself of addictive and unhealthy food, you will feel and look a lot better extremely quickly without beating yourself up, or allowing anyone else to.

Finally

If you are a social creature, get yourself a dehydrator and make yourself some dried vegetable chips/crisps instead of conventional nibbles such as nuts, potato chips etc.  Much better for you, much tastier and very social.  Investigate raw vegan dips to go with them.  Pretty soon your thinner friends, who seem to have all the answers, will be asking you for advice. You can get a really good one for under £30 from outdoor activity centres, for hikers.

Do not allow anyone to damage your confidence, and do not stay in thinking that things will be better when you are thin.  Nothing changes when you are thin, except that you feel a bit better.  I have had the same handful of men hitting on me, fat or thin, for twenty five years.  Whatever they see in you, it isn’t your hot, hot ass, no matter what they tell you.