I used to have a friend who spent his entire life going over every negative exchange he had, whether this was at the shops, or serious bullying, or stalking in some cases. He had been through a lot, and had quite aggravated PTSD.
Things that he mentioned eventually included events that had happened when I was there, and some of the bullying had been directed at me. I hadn’t noticed. He told me several times anyway. I used to tell him not to notice.
“But it happened? Aren’t you angry?” he would say.
Well, if I had to deal with it, I would deal with it, but I find it much better not to notice. It is usually much better and happier not to notice. There are a lot of stupid people in the world. You just ignore them and do what you are doing.
This is the difference between a victim and a leader. A leader just blasts on regardless, and a victim sits and frets about it.
I can think of nothing sadder than a bully who stalks his own girlfriend, and a girlfriend that immediately joins in when he harasses other women. These people are sick. He has groomed her to this extent, I expect he will be getting her to procure more victims for him eventually.
I again spent yesterday afternoon enquiring as to whether there is anything I can do about this other than make police complaints, as this is of no interest at all and seems like rather a waste of time the police could be spending on more important things.
Since my film was nothing to do with them and they weren’t involved, they could have just let me get on with the job. Instead I am now expected to be stopped completing a project yet again because I don’t matter.
I have been through a lot, and the bottom line is always that I don’t matter. Hence it is much easier not to notice nasty people. I recommend it.
