So far the film is progressing very slowly. The trick with filming is to plan everything to the maximum degree and accept that nothing is right.
The first day of filming was the anniversary of an important death, so I was doing an athiest art funeral, which perturbed the stupid English people I was working with no end as it involved social conscience. It would take too long to explain to them what that is, so I didn’t bother.
The shoot was attacked by someone we know and love from a couple of years ago, so had to be abandoned since his needs were apparently very urgent. I have since tried a reshoot and decided I was unhappy with the costume and set up, so it will have to be done again in a different way. It is hard to be patient when you have to wait for everything to arrive before you can proceed. In the meantime I have been left to ponder the nature of love, and our approach to it.
The person who attacked the shoot was desperate for attention in any form, so he would say that his getting up in the morning and deciding what he wants at the expense of other people was perfectly natural. He probably wonders why I dropped everything and went and did ask he asked despite his destroying my equipment and insulting me.
It would never occur to me to do otherwise, I just didn’t question it. It did make him look very stupid as he has been trying to get me to lose my temper with him for months and has spectacularly failed. I just don’t think like that. I think if one is in possession of a fragile and damaged ego, one assumes that everyone else is too, which makes life very unpredictable when the person you are trying to upset simply says “if that is what you want, I’ll go get it for you.”
Anyway the whole thing was a mess, I have to replan a few things to hit the values I want to hit, so it was a worthy practise. The costume did look a little bit as if a wee lady who likes sewing made it, which of course she did, and is now being revamped into something a bit better. This is because a very nice lady I see regularly is waiting to see how I have done this and I am kind of using her as the muse for the outfit. It is important to know what triggers you into improving.
I did get a bit cross after crying for a week or so about having to deal with this and finding the idiot still cruising around looking for more women to torment, and swiftly regretted it when I discovered that he had again blotted his copybook elsewhere and I had unwittingly played into the entire scenario, even though I knew nothing about it and was just trying to get some work done. Sigh. It seems that my guiding principle wants me to avoid losing my cool altogether.
It is high time to finish this work, so I am focusing on that in the meantime. I am bored with it lying around and I want to make a beautiful silly film.
It is tiresome being misunderstood.
