How not to seduce your ex

First, make sure you are not at all interested in anything she has to say.

Then dominate the conversation with your imaginary superiority, based on half-assed references to things she might have heard of, or, if you are particularly dull-witted, things she might have seen on TV.

Ignore any concerns she may have or anything she might be feeling.

Allow yourself to be intimidated by anything she might have done that you are incapable of.

Don’t, for any reason, show any interest in anything she is doing or volunteer to be remotely helpful.

Refer to people she doesn’t like or know as if they are vastly superior.

Do not allow yourself to pay her a compliment or give her any reason to suspect that you are anything but the same lousy shit she dumped thirty years ago.

Then, after all that, try to go home with her on the expectation that she would find any of the above remotely attractive because presumably she is now bored and depressed enough to want to bonk you senseless.


Where is the kind and considerate person that wants to just be reasonably nice to me in a kind of biting and scratching context?  Where is the time-wasting passion?  Where is the interest?


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