I am here today to talk about government. The kind of Strong and Stable government this country needs to move forward, with clear vision, preventing the kind of disruption brought about by the inevitable coalition of chaos that voting for anyone else would bring.
When you vote, you should vote with the idea that we plan to create jobs – jobs for London and the Home counties, paid for with your taxes and the suffering of people who don’t live in the Home counties or London, and who rely on the benefits we plan to cut.
Scotland has been divided, by voting firmly against Brexit and against the Conservatives. You should now consider the matter of union. For Strong and Stable government, with clear vision, free of disruption, you should immediately change your vote to Conservative, even though most of you have never ever voted Conservative in your lives.
I am not here today to talk about policy, which is obviously above your head because you are stupid enough to consider voting for me. I am here to remind you that anyone with clear vision can see, that what we all need is leadership with strength and stability.
A vote for me and my team, will offer an opportunity. An opportunity for a future with clear vision, leadership, and strength and stability. An avoidance of disruption from anyone who disagrees with me, taking the country forward to a future free of the NHS, free of those messy disabled and long term welfare claimants, free of pensions and free of well-maintained schools outwith the PFI agreements.
The Scottish majority, who voted against Conservatives, against the rape clause, against killing people, against Brexit are divided. They are divided by the lack of the Strong and Stable leadership required to take the country forward with clear vision which only me and my team can provide.
So for Unity, for strength and stability, for policies that I plan to keep a secret until after you have voted, for clear vision, and to take the country forward, vote Conservative. We promise that we will employ decent speechwriters if you vote for us. Using your money, which you aren’t getting back because you are too dumb to get married to a hedge fund manager and have a ten million pound house like me.
Nobody of course, is mentioning the terror threats of whomever planted parcels saying SNP out, Tories in in Scotland this week. Can you imagine if it was the other way around? It would have been on every channel.