April, 2018 - Ina Disguise

My friend happened to show me this video he had made of Ormus Plutonium today, and I instantly burst into tears.

Why? Is it because Wolfe is like totally cool and I don’t measure up to it? No, I cannot honestly say I have ever felt like that directly.

Is it because I am too hopeless? No.

Is it because I was never good enough in the first place? Yes, but not for the obvious reasons.

Having met him, I can honestly say that none of my self beatings have been justified from his reaction to me at all. He has never been the issue.

Looking at Ormus Plutonium, I see it is crude, I see it is experimental, I see that I chose the colours extremely carefully to send a very complicated message that I am not sure I can verbalise even now. Those three Ormus bags took over a year of thought. They decorated the walls of my room for months whilst I thought about the engineering, and I am pleased that I achieved what I wanted to achieve with them, although I can do much better.

The point of all the Wolfe work was development. I would never have invested that much time in myself if I had not been repairing a lot of damage that I would never have gone anywhere near if it wasn’t for meeting him. How he managed this in a very limited amount of time – I think perhaps an hour and a half in total over nearly a decade, is a mystery, but I guess shit happens.

One of the earlier pieces, Saxophone, took five weeks of enraged lust after meeting Nelson, a musician that played vaguely Islamic saxophone jazz thirteen years earlier. Here it is, on the cover of Best Sex Scandal Ever, which is a fun book about a period of amusement I indulged in at some point in the past (I do not remember exactly when)

I can see that this represents the cool and hot sounds of a saxophone. I can see exactly what I was doing and why, although actually doing it required no thought whatsoever. It just required intense emotional rage. Nelson, coincidentally, was basically a blonde Wolfe visually with an irritating tendency towards anarchy and communes. Very pretty but no interesting content.

So, we know from this that I have some specific superficialities. I am very fond of curly hair, for example. Nelson, however, lost his appeal in the five weeks it took me to make Saxophone. Wolfe has thus far taken nine years for me to get to an emotional starting point.

I appreciate that readers will wonder why somebody who sells nutribullets and healthfood would be such an all-consuming interest, beyond his adorable nose?

The answer is in the philosophy underpinning the work that Wolfe likes to insert as filler. Wolfe’s filler is a lot more interesting than even he is aware of, and it is there that I found the material that I am still wary of working on because it dwarfs any other intellectual work I could be doing. As I have said, the complexities of running a country are light work in comparison. Philosophically, he has brought up a lot of huge issues that I would otherwise have not bothered to dig up, because I would have been too busy raking around in the shallows and probably remaining very cynical about humanity generally.

I am still not good enough for Wolfe, not in a human sense, but because I have not produced the piece of work I have been preparing for. I have another year or two of preparation work to do before I am sufficiently arrogant to return to it, and I have some artwork that I need to do before I approach the serious writing.

As someone with a very serious approach to mental development, it is important that the three dimensional work comes before the two dimensional work, because that is how to get the best out of my brain. I have to have the time to put into it, and I have to have the confidence. This ain’t about shagging.

It doesn’t make it hurt any less, and it doesn’t mean that there is any point in my having relationships when I would be wasting everybody’s time. Whether you are lucky in love or not, the trip is the trip. This one is huge, frightening and needs to be as refined as I can make it, because it is more important than anything else I could do with my life.

That is about as close as I can get to describing it.

The Conservative Sell Off

During the Reich’s first 10 years, eugenicists across America welcomed Hitler’s plans as the logical fulfilment of their own decades of research and effort. Indeed, they were envious as Hitler rapidly began sterilising hundreds of thousands and systematically eliminating non-Aryans from German society. This included the Jews. Ten years after Virginia passed its 1924 sterilisation act, Joseph Dejarnette, superintendent of Virginia’s Western State Hospital, complained in the Richmond Times-Dispatch: “The Germans are beating us at our own game.”

https://www.theguardian.com/uk/2004/feb/06/race.usa

So, to continue with what I was saying yesterday, the current crop of Conservatives think they will get away with selling the NHS to private companies, public services such as security contracts, various management departments of the Civil Service (we have already seen the disaster that is Atos) I would hazard a guess that prisons will be up for grabs, in which case we will have a similar capital labour (for this read American slavery) system, and yet more dumbing down and suppression of classical education as fees are raised and courses are dictated by ideocratic companies from the Land of the dumb.

This was flagged for my attention a few months ago, in the course of an episode in parliament which was recounted to me. I didn’t even need to see it.

In the event that you wish to protect your country, I would suggest that no matter what party you support, you actually join it and do something to prevent this happening. They will not simply get away with doing this without serious repercussions for your life.

In the past, the Uk has pulled many interesting scams. Consignia was a case in point. Whilst the public was told that Royal Mail was haemorrhaging money and had to be sold, the Consignia episode was used to expand Royal Mail into the international market. Consignia was delivering mail in Russia, amongst other countries whilst the taxpayer was told that they needed to shore up the losses they were allegedly making.

Once your public services are sold there is little that can be done to prevent them being sold on, to far larger companies that will then expect to be able to lobby the toothless Lilliput government and win. If they do not, the Uk will then be pressured into it using diplomatic pressure. In short, if you don’t take action now, your country will become a rather inferior American state, and will be subject to:

Capital labour, which for the uninformed is where prisoners are forced to work to produce goods. This may sound great, until you notice that the crime rate mysteriously soars to enable companies to access free labour. America has the highest rate of incarceration in the world, precisely because they are still operating a slave labour system using this pretext.

Private healthcare – As I was saying yesterday, America faces a massive problem because of their faulty ideas about healthcare. The companies have been colluding to destroy people’s health for years. Our own Board of Nutrition is infested with corporate interests already, and has been for some time. Hence you are given incorrect advice about nutrition on the basis that you will consume what food companies produce, develop a known variety of diseases, which are then treated by healthcare providers, supplied with products from the pharmaceutical companies. Often you can actually trace the collusions, an example being Eli Lilly signing up with Walmart to provide them with cut-price diabetes medication. I do not imagine that you think terribly much of this idea, whatever your ideas about punishing the poor.

More war – War is always good for business, isn’t it? Death is always a good end to any argument. Americans are very keen on interfering with other countries, and very keen on demonising countries that might compete with them. I am sure you will want to vote for more of this.

More social engineering – you too can experience the joy of having a moronic doctor tell you that the answer to your loved one’s problems is to be dead. You may want to read more on the American philosophy of eugenics and its history, which actually precedes Nazi Germany.

There are also, beyond that, important lessons about American legal culture. What the radical Nazis touted about American law was its open-endedness, its adaptability, its common-law pragmatism, and in particular its permeability to political influence. The feature of American law that the radical Nazis admired is still present, in particular in American criminal punishment — which is spectacularly and very nearly uniquely harsh. That fact has a great deal to do with its exceptional vulnerability to political pressure, whether through tough-on-crime politics or through politicization of the judiciary and prosecutorial corps. And, of course, the race problem is very much present in American criminal justice as well. What we see there is the same disturbing pattern of politicization that radical Nazis admired in the 1930s. To that extent, working through the details of this disturbing episode in the 1930s helps us to recognize the roots and the depth of our problems today.

https://www.chronicle.com/article/How-US-Law-Inspired-the/239494

You may not consider that other people are important or even necessary for your tiresome existence, but there are still people left that actually care about others. Money is a lot less important than free thought, freedom of expression, the acquisition of – shock horror – actual knowledge – and basic human rights.

If you do not agree, then by all means continue to sleep until your life is entirely dictated by a profit-maker.

If you believe that the non-existent free market and the acquisition of money is more important than anything else, then again, please feel free to remain asleep.

If you care about other people then WAKE THE FUCK UP. I could continue to paint the rest of the picture, but I am trying to remain relatively restrained.

Boris is looking rather lovely, and should be ready tomorrow or the next day. I am rather pleased with him so far. Apparently his fabulous lips are particularly appealing.

Ormus Plutonium the love story

The Conservative Sell Off