90 year old is now a raw foodist

My mother returned from hospital dehydrated, sleepy, with a prescription for a double dose of ensure, which is a particularly horrible plastic food they like to give old people, a double dose of a surgical grade antacid to counteract the effects of an injection to dissolve her giant blood clot and a double dose of laxative.  She had been on a saline drip which had caused her right arm to basically be one huge bruise.  She lasted about two days before starting to sleep constantly again.

She has been back for about three weeks now.  Yesterday I got a call from a dietician who had been assigned to her in hospital, who had now gotten around to actually dealing with her case.  She seemed unsure if my mother was actually still alive, and referred to her as ‘being home for a short while.’  She asked when would be suitable to come around?  That is what is best for my mother, after all.

“Actually” I said “I have been kind of passively studying herbalism and wellness for most of my life, and I have put her on a high calorie alkaline diet.  She doesn’t need ensure, she doesn’t need laxatives, and she really doesn’t need the antacid, which in its description includes sore joints, confusion and a contraindication with her heart tablet.  So we really don’t need you.”

“What is she eating?”  the dietician seemed concerned.

“Raw chocolate, various grasses, a few seaweeds and some herbs.  She also gets seven portions of fruit and vegetables a day.  She has put on some weight, her skin problems have improved, she is alert, and she is no longer screwing herself up to the right.  We are doing fine.  She tried some porridge the other morning, but she really prefers what I am giving  her.”

The dietician seemed dumbfounded.  “Does she have a choice?”  She tried to regain control of this dangerous situation.

Given that my mother had stopped eating altogether, this seemed a bit cheeky, so I salved her ego by prattling on about holistic treatment of dementia, and how my mother has not only surpassed the expected life expectancy by five years, but retained her capacity until very recently.  She has always been rather dismissive of my health interest.  She is really quite keen on it now that she is drinking a drink that tastes of salted caramel (today, tomorrow’s is cherry bakewell flavour) but actually contains a host of supernutrients and the optimum antioxidants possible, in addition to her seven a day.

My mother has improved by the day, to the point that memories from nine years ago that she has never acknowledged have returned, and she now asks for things and has regained her grip.  All because I made a giant vat full of supermix when I was raw.  It is the best four hundred I have ever spent.

Supermix has 80 ingredients, a mixture of Wolfe suggestions and old European remedies.  I really made it for me, since she didn’t like the idea of health food, and when I lived on it for 5 weeks my very grumpy neighbour told me it was the best I had ever looked.  Evidently I did something right.

My friend, who was also disparaging about my brief healthy period, is now building up his own supermix, and I am in the process of discarding the ‘normal’ food and trying to regain my former glow.

It just goes to show, when people ignore what you are saying, belittle your attempts to take care of yourself when you are taking care of others, and participate in their own bullshit, you really should just shut the door and get on with it, because usually, you are right.

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Introduction to Ina

This week, I decided to launch myself a bit more seriously, in preparation for the finished Boris pieces, which I think are the start of a more revealing art period.  Several of the sites would like me to write a regular blog, and so here is your handy introduction to Ina Disguise.

My father, also an artist, always advised me to do anything but art, since producing artwork for money is not the happiest of experiences if you like to express anything.  Therefore, his reasoning was avoid art in order to produce better art.  This led to my becoming a habitual over worker, as I took him at his word and worked every hour I could to avoid doing any artwork for many years.

Ina Disguise came about as a result of my inability to have a conversation with David Wolfe, a natural health promoter that I wanted to talk to about some academic work I was doing on eco-economics, marketing and behavioural economics.  I managed to connect with him briefly on a few websites, but he only seemed to want to talk trash and pretend to himself that he is very clever.  I am not sure why he does this, because apart from his lousy writing and a murky past, he actually is very clever.

As my family were trying to use abusing me as an excuse to rob their own mother, this came as the last straw and I became very unhappy, despite having just lost about 160lb and looking unusually hot that year.  Therefore, after spending several months fighting off the urge to eat myself into oblivion, I started sewing, which is a habit I had previously formed whilst avoiding horrible and hurtful people and recovering from failed love affairs.  If you cannot have the relationship, you might as well have a nice carpet out of your misdirected emotions.

Since he had blocked me from actually speaking to him, after it transpired that I was unusual in seeing through his many disguises online, I then wrote Best Scandal Ever in an effort to appease and inform him why I was buttering him up in the first place.  Best Romance Ever followed, and, since I am of the opinion that keeping one’s brain balanced is rather important, I spent the time that I was not writing doing a lot more stitching.

I had previously amassed art materials with every spare penny from every job I had had since being told that I had to give up everything for my parents as nobody else in the family would ever be willing to do it.  Currently two of them are sitting idle with pensions whilst I am unable to earn my own.

Anyway, within a year of putting my work out in public, GQ had got in touch, which has been an enormous encouragement, and my work has now been in Tatler several times, and last month I realised an early ambition and managed to get a spot in World of Interiors.  I cannot tell you how much the girls from these magazines have helped me at what has been a very rough and ego bashing time.

So now I work in batches, usually five or six pieces at a time, and I have released several batches over the last four years, with varying results.  Some of the pieces are more popular with other people than me, but my experiments have taught me a lot.  Scale is a great tutor, as is ensuring that you are spoilt for stock volume in raw materials.  As with writing, the ideas you would like to have only come when you have indulged the ideas you initially think are merely basic.

Wolfe taught me a lot about marketing, allowing yourself to express even the most rudimentary ideas, on the basis that most people cannot manage that and will show some interest anyway.  There is simply no point in waiting until you are good enough, because if you don’t practise and attempt things, you don’t develop the stamina, skill and confidence to get to the good stuff.  One of my pieces, Raw Sex Object, took seven years to complete, and I am not even interested in selling it because it is really a giant sampler.

Anyway, Wolfe has never understood that I am not trying to kill his career, and I cannot be bothered explaining it to him, so I have now embarked on the Boris adventure, as I perceive Boris to be a far more settled and confident person who might actually appreciate my amusing coded communication skills.  I shall lavish attention on poor Boris until I presumably focus on a very serious person, such as the Pope.  In the meantime, enjoy the artwork.

Ina

 

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All about Boris

The Mayor Boris Johnson in Croydon, South London, Tuesday November 22, 2011. Photo by Andrew Parsons/ Parsons Media

 

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Interviewed him for a TV current affairs research job in the 1980s.

My notes say he was a shallow, egocentric upper class twit who I would not trust to go to the loo on his own.

Johnson is typical of the upper class boot boys of his era. Unprincipled, self serving and arrogant beyond belief. Bullington boys with enough money to buy their way out of the trouble they caused, wrecking restaurants, indecently assaulting women passers by and using threatening and abusive behaviour that would get us plebs locked up.

Don’t laugh at Boris,give him he hatred he and his list boy friends warrant.

 

OK – I have a problem with this comment on a number of levels – the first one being that neither Stanley nor Boris are genuinely upper class.  Boris is more aware of this than his sister, which is why he has perfected his presentation skills to the point that he remains likeable and relatively honest for a Tory.

Having experienced Rachel, who works hard at not understanding how the other half live, Boris is a deceptively responsible person when compared with Stanley, whose luck in life is matched only by a psychotic libido.  Yes, he has polished a public act called Boris, but no, I cannot agree that he is a standard Bullingdon boot boy, especially as he avoided actually doing anything with the club as he did not like forking out cash for destroying people’s businesses and getting pissed.

In fact, Boris is a scholarship boy, spurred on by sibling rivalry, and Stanley is the son of a farmer.  A farmer who lost his farm because Stanley’s dreams and opportunities lay elsewhere.  To suggest that they are merely upper class twits would be a gross underestimation of their social skills.  Actually, they are fairly ordinary Somerset farmers who are now doing something else.

I rather like this mischief.  The idea of having a trademark manner and hairstyle which renders you memorable, combined with the arch observation skills necessary to pull such social mobility off with aplomb, appeals to me enormously.

Currently, Boris sees his role as distraction.  As long as you are watching Boris, you aren’t watching boring old Phillip Hammond or Theresa May.  Who remembers a single thing Hammond did as foreign secretary?  Exactly.  He is no great shakes as a chancellor either, but they are all very rich.

Boris is guilty of flippancy and he is guilty of not taking politics terribly seriously, but this is why he presents a good antidote to the massively grim notion of Conservative rule.  He is also providing himself with sufficiently great publicity never to have to worry about selling a book.  If he decided not to bother going to work tomorrow, I have no doubt that he would not want for money.

This is not to say that Boris is always nice.  Plainly this is not so, but again who really wants to look much further than the entertaining front?  Stanley is very good at this wall of distraction too, which makes it easy for them to deceive when necessary.

To conclude, insulting someone on the basis of class is snobbery, whether you are looking up or down.  One chooses one’s persona to a great degree, exemplified by my being considerably posher than my siblings.  This sounds like I am acting, especially as I went to a horrid school and my siblings all went private.  I can tell you that it is not an act at all, I, like Boris spent two years from ten to twelve avariciously reading Wodehouse.  It is an imprint which does not leave you. (I can tell you that it is no advantage at all when you live in Glasgow and have an infamous leader from Red Clydeside as an ancestor)

Boris’s carpet is in the final stages, but I would like to present it with the first of the furniture collection, Bordello Rhetoric, as they represent both Boris and Al.  As ever, these are made as gifts, but should Boris not wish to pick up his presents, they will be put out for sale in due course.  Once I have the shoes and the furniture complete, I will commence work on Lucifer Ogilvie.

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The most expensive handbags in the world

1001 nights diamond purse

  1. Mouawad’s 1001 nights Diamond purse $3.8 million

I rather like this one, it at least has an interesting shape and took 8800 hours to make.  I am not up to spending that amount of time on one piece quite yet.  It is gold, encrusted with several thousand diamonds.

Lieber Precious Rose Bag

2. Lieber Precious Rose bag $92,000

This one at least has a great shape and structure. Again with a couple of thousand precious stones, if you like pink I am sure it is great, and will have taken a long time to make.

 

Chanel Diamond Forever

3. Chanel Diamond Forever $261,000

This is a tedious bag, for tedious people who want to wear that all-important logo.  Unimaginative and a waste of a fine crocodile.

Hermes Birkin by Tanaka

4. Hermes Birkin by Ginza Tanaka $1.9 million

This is a beauty and is also very practical.  Less tasteless than the Chanel, and yet still having that all important bling.

LV tribute patchwork bag

5. LV Tribute patchwork bag $42,000

This looks as if it is begging to be a counterfeit bag that you can snap up in poundstretcher. Beyonce apparently got suckered into actually buying it.  I think Beyonce should be asking me to make one for her. At least there would only be one if she did.

6. Urban Satchel Louis Vuitton $150,000

Seriously, next time you clean out your handbag, just get some E6000 and stick the contents to the outside of the bag.

Marc Jacobs Carolyn Crocodile handbag

7. Marc Jacobs Carolyn Crocodile handbag $38,000

This bag is so ugly that I am not sure I have words. If you actually like this, please send me all your money so that I can save you from yourself.  Try a market stall in the average small town and you will find nicer bags.

This is a small selection of the hundreds of bags that cost about the same as a house in the UK. As you can see, money does not buy taste.

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Looking for Work

 

Every so often I wonder if I am managing, and I look for additional work.  Tonight, since my mother has at last returned from hospital, I looked for work from home.

I have a fair amount of experience working from home, not just because of my lack of interest in social jostling.  I worked from home for some time as my parents illnesses progressed, and so I have an unusual level of insight when it comes to work from home jobs.

I have watched carefully over the years, as home working went from quirk to fad to increasingly preferred option, and I see that I am not the only person who appreciates the lack of commute and lack of conversation involved in working from home.

Glassdoor is a good site to look at for reviews of home working options, as is the student room in the UK.  You will tend to find the reviews via your search for the company you intend to work for on Google.  I recommend this before you even think about applying for that underpaid source of vital income online.

People per hour has improved enormously since its previous incarnation, and Odesk has now become Upwork.  As long as you are willing to put in the extra hours on the pitching processes, these are invaluable if you need to supplement your dwindling income.

Homepage

Clickworker is also very useful and can generate you income from all your gadgets if you are so inclined.  There are a few sites that do similar hit based work, such as Mechanical Turk if you can be bothered going through the irritating process of registering for American tax.

Careers

Lionbridge is a good direct employer, and an increasing number of successful direct employment models are now available to you if you feel working from home is for you.

I have worked for about five or six different online employers over the years, and with the exception of Ipsos Mori, they have been very good. To be fair to Ipsos Mori, they do try to create a good opportunity, but as with so many companies, internal problems make them rather miserable to work for, reflected in their poor employee reviews.  I cannot emphasise the importance of checking before you apply for information from ex employees enough.

So, yesterday JT Coxx advertised a free seminar on my Facebook timeline.  The enticing advertisement said that there were too few female motivational speakers, and naturally my interest was piqued, being something of a motivational speaking connoisseur.  I duly checked the reviews, to find that JT Coxx is considered worldwide to be an abrasive, arrogant scammer who creates free seminars to con people out of hundreds and thousands of dollars.  This theme seemed familiar, given the descriptions I had previously been given of the boiler room tactics employed by David Wolfe. They are cut from similar cloth, being in the voice-of-yesteryear Tony Robbins punch the air market.

Sadly, I decided not to bother with the free seminar from JT Coxx.  The quality just wasn’t up to much, and I cannot afford to squander my time and money on Wolfe. So, my conclusion tonight, when reviewing the working from home, hiding from the world options, was

Why am I looking to write blog posts and copy for other people for button money, when I should be developing my online presence?

Which in itself, of course is a motivational statement – why be a follower when you can be a leader?  The pay may not emerge for some time, if ever, but far better to position yourself as a predator rather than prey, whether you are grazing stock, in the form of an employee, or prey in the form of the horror of being an actual customer!

So, there hangs the crux of the matter. Rather than concentrating on the Zig Ziglar school of not being a moaner, don’t put yourself in the position of having something to moan about – avoid irritants where possible.  Separate yourself from the idea of being an employee, and instead strategise ways of freeing yourself from the whole paradigm.  If you must be employed – seek out miserable jobs to remind yourself why you are looking elsewhere for inspiration.  That is the key to being a great employee after all, playing a role that you despise as well as you possibly can under difficult circumstances.

I think in order to progress, I will release the existing work on audible and work on hubpages.  The carpet is needing my attention once I have my mother in a more stable state of health.  Thereafter I will keep a closer look at the world of employment, to remind myself why I really need to get a move on to avoid it.

 

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Writing Development

As someone who has always been told that I tell a good story, it is one of the few things that I am fairly confident about.  I am wildly undisciplined, I rarely redraft before publishing, and as a result I have to go back and read things I have put out months and years later.

I have found, however, that the blog has been very helpful in building this confidence, and in forming a writing habit.  Having said this, I took a look at Reality Check this evening, and was horrified that emotional topics put me in a frenzied panic which renders me almost unreadable.  Mandatory Equality, on the other hand, is a fun read which took little time to make a complicated point.

I have not achieved very much over the last 4 years or so, apart from 11 books, 3 art collections and the beginnings of two computer games.  I am very glad that I have not achieved very much.

Why?  Having read Reality Check, a particularly personal story which is very patchy and a severely abbreviated history of the last twenty years of family life – I have stuck rather too closely to the ‘write what you know’ hypothesis and was too horrified to do the story justice.  When I think about the ideas I have for the forthcoming Lucifer Ogilivie in comparison, I am having far more elegant and interesting ideas now BECAUSE I AM WILLING TO GIVE MYSELF THE TIME TO THINK IT THROUGH.

This is the problem for anyone embarking on a career of self expression.  It takes time to take yourself seriously enough to determine a good direction to go in. Rushing it just ends up with a sub-standard product.  Self expression requires self development, and that takes dedication and selfishness.  Otherwise you might as well consign yourself to a lifetime of mediocrity.

So, if you want to write, first take yourself seriously enough to take your time over it.  Edit at least once, and give yourself space to move on and then look back.  Don’t market like mad too quickly, because chances are your next work will be a development on the last.  As with artwork, your crap idea will develop with time into what you really should have done in the first place, so you need to be willing to make mistakes and admit to them.

This is harder than it sounds – and it takes failure to humble yourself to your craft.  I read other self-published work all the time that will never get anywhere without an editor.  Again, a matter of taking yourself seriously enough to put the time, work and possibly money into.

For example, I took a look at the art carpets available online – I am almost ready to go to market as a carpet maker after twenty years of making, and sometimes not making, but thinking about, carpets – this is because I know what direction my carpet paintings are to go in, because my idea was always to be the Tiffany, or the Faberge of carpet makers.  Carpet making is my thing, but it is not so great that I want to be grafting away at putting hundreds out.  Far better to perfect the art and put out ten good ones.

Several mainstream art sites that I looked at last night had people that should not have bothered marketing their carpets at all, in much the same way that many books being pumped out are not ready.

You do have to balance this, however with what you want to write – a writer that wants to market a product will have the capacity for increased volume of less intense work, such as David Wolfe.  A writer trying to create a cult like following willing to pay for more expensive retreats, such as Gabriel Cousins will, however need to put more time and thought into creating an ethos.  Likewise Jilly Cooper, who must write at a fearsome pace to put out work that badly constructed, needs less preparation than Chekhov.

So, to conclude – to write well, decide who you are and then write badly.  As Aristotle says, if you wish to acquire a virtue, first pretend to have it, and eventually you will.

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Work Update

I have no idea why I associate Boris Johnson with rock pools, but apparently I do.  At least four of the pieces I am working on associated with Boris are related to rock pools.  I have a carpet, a box and a trunk on wheels, a small table all with rock pool tendencies.

Wolfish, one of the remaining David Wolfe pieces, is swimming in a coral reef in a tank, but apparently in my head Boris is all about rock pools. Perhaps the psychologists could have a think on that one. It is probably something to do with sex, although I am not aware of it.  Most of my work is related to emotion rather than sex in terms of whichever form things take, but the colours are usually a give-away in terms of the sexual element.

The furniture progress has been slow but Jemima Khan is going to be spectacular, Iain Duncan Smith is a lot of work, and Theresa May is yet to get off the ground due to lack of funds.  Darius Guppy is on pause as he needs a lot of sanding work.

I am starting to get psyched up for the book, so I will be doing some reading shortly in anticipation of Lucifer Ogilvie.  Not to be too cynical about it, but it would help a lot if Boris likes it, so I hope I can at least persuade him to read it when the time comes. My ideas seem to be developing somewhat, so hopefully it will be a funny and clever take on Conservatism through the eyes of the alternative Boris.

The games are on hold at the moment, I managed to salvage them from yet another broken computer. (my cat is very fond of computers, which is why I seem to go through five or six laptops a year, although she does not seem to share the same love of the PC).

I am seriously considering a short story about racism, since whoever manages such things has successfully persuaded us that protecting our own rights involves maligning other people’s.  Mind your Language, a programme which is usually denounced as racist in the UK, is massively popular in India and Pakistan.

 

 

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France elects Macron

We in Scotland know a lot about cultural warfare.  It starts subtly, and then when you realise that you are at war, it becomes very obvious.  From deciding what we are for marketing purposes – in our case tartan, shortbread and country dancing which includes the Canadian Barn Dance rather than warriors who are very capable of showing you a really good time before flaying you alive – to eroding the nation’s confidence by misleading them as to the nature of their financial welfare (Scotland is far better off than England, who have sucked us dry for decades, if not centuries) we are well aware that an entity claiming that you have no culture is declaring war.

France has just voted for Macron, a man who presided over their economic problems, which make ours pale into insignificance by comparison, under Hollonde.  I think this choice is a mistake.

Front Nationale have never been all that dear to my heart, even ten years ago they were fairly brutal, but it seems very sad that France, a country so proud of their traditions and culture, should vote for a man who would like to see that culture diluted to the point of eradication.

I was in Paris a couple of years ago, and was very shocked at the deprivation I saw even on a heavily sanitised tourist trip.  People are suffering greatly from lack of employment, lack of housing and there were some frightening scenes just out of our direct vision, immigrant populations without much access to resources forming flea markets and tent villages amongst the motorways and elegant buildings.

France has been struggling under this burden for some time, and they have had far more extreme terrorist activity than we have had in the UK.  At what point do we agree that this is not acceptable and do something about it?  You may not be directly affected by terrorism, but you can bet that you know someone that knows someone who has if you live in most of the countries in Europe.  Macron has also stated in the past that ‘France will just have to get used to it.’

To what end, you may ask?  Well Macron is a globalist, a believer in the supremacy of the corporation, a believer in cheap labour and branded values.  He is not a patriot, but like Tony Blair an opportunist who seeks personal gain from expediting the wishes of the elite.

Good luck with that France.  You will think very differently when you reap what you have sown.  Just as England will lose what little they have left to the Conservative rush to fill their own pockets, you will lose your identity unless you think more carefully at the election to come.

 

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Corporatist Healthcare – a handy peep

As we know, the NHS is quietly on the way to being privatised.  Whilst the system is not set to change over to the American system immediately – I thought the articles from the USA today were very interesting.  Here is the first, from congressman Mo Brooks.  Enjoy reading the Independent article and then watch the video:

Poor people don’t deserve healthcare because they haven’t led good lives

Congressman Fires Back at Chelsea Clinton over Pre-Existing Co…

Congressman Mo Brooks responds to Chelsea Clinton's criticism of him over comments about pre-existing conditions: "Maybe she wants to run for public office and try to do better than her mommy did," he tells ABC News. http://abcn.ws/2p5rEwM

Posted by This Week on Tuesday, 2 May 2017

 

Quite the charmer, isn’t he?

Here is the third entry, from Congressman Tom MacArthur:

Personal tragedy drives deal making GOP congressman on health care

Now this last article is quite complex, the congressman is proposing a corporate solution to a public health issue – he proposes that states accommodate higher cost patients at their own discretion, based upon a system where they can opt out of full coverage healthcare insurance schemes.  So having a baby will cost you lots of money in some states because they have opted out of mandatory maternity cover, but should your baby then have cancer, the state may or may not have a financial pool to pick up the increased cost of insurance.  Otherwise, the insurance companies have the option to simply charge anyone with pre-existing conditions more for being ill rather than opting people out of the system on the basis of their illness altogether.

Now he does this on the basis that, unusually for a republican, he is aware that it may well happen, and in fact has happened to him, twice.  His background in the insurance industry has made him unusually clued up on the issue of insurance.  Here we see the great failure of the American healthcare and political system.

Rather than showing concern for the victims of their piss-poor idea of taking care of their own people, he cites the example of himself and his father, both of whom certainly have a work ethic, but no apparent sense of responsibility for direct care.  You cannot be in two places at once, had either him or his father had direct responsibility for caring, they would have been unable to fund medical care at all, but rather than reflect upon this, he comes up with a corporate solution to a public health issue that again shits on the poor and unwell.

The Republicans would seem to be desperate to prove that there is a corporate solution to everything, that corporations are capable of showing some responsibility towards their victims/customers, and that everything will mysteriously work itself out, regardless of people’s individual circumstances or the level of understanding at state level.

Having worked in hundreds of different places in my life, the understanding of his policy is likely to be limited.  Rules will be misinterpreted, states will get it wrong, the public will be told by a bored receptionist that no, they cannot get any help with their stroke/cancer/brain injury and that they are uninsurable.  People will try several places and simply give up and watch their loved ones die.

This of course, does not matter to a conservative, as long as their costs are kept down and they aren’t held back by the great unwashed.  This is the reason they become fearful in later life.  Having spent so many years shitting all over everybody else, they suddenly realise that they too, require help and nobody is available to provide it because they need to amass their own pile of not very self-protective cash.

The system of American healthcare, and the idea that it will never happen to you is laughable to us in Europe, because of our more advanced idea of social conscience that they were so eager to stamp out when they smashed their unions.  My grandfather was lured to the USA on the promise of work in the 1920s, only to find out that he was expected to be a scab, whereupon as a good communist he left rather quickly.

I was asked whether I wanted to move to the USA in 1998 when I was touring and playing backgammon.

“No,”  I replied “I could not live in a country where I know perfectly well that people are dying of poverty. I actually had no idea that the NHS was as important to me until I was actually here with people who just don’t get it.  This is not a civilised country.”

The same thing goes for food in the USA.  Mo Brooks, above, blames people for smoking, drinking or eating the wrong thing, yet there is no question of shutting down the providers of poison.  No question of the corporation showing the responsibility and education he expects from the individual.

Their ideas of ‘cheap food at any cost’ have led to suffering all over the world, from smallholders losing their farms to people who can afford American chemicals and trucks, to the infestation of patented life in the form of seeds.  GM and hybrid crops from America are economic and agricultural invasion, not supplied, as they say to prevent starvation, but supplied to make the poor poorer and starve them out, and to create a smaller population of more malleable landowners.

If we are to survive as an independent nation, we should be more wary of America generally.  They are extremely fond of money, and they are not responsible citizens of the world.  I am with Prince Charles.  There is no reason at all why Britain should not, as an island be the purveyors of clean food and clean politics, rather than becoming immersed in the complex deception and domineering double talk employed by the Yanks in the course of their complete disrespect for the poor, whatever country they are unfortunate enough to be poor in.

 

 

 

 

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Things people say

 

The election is becoming tiresome, with Theresa May displaying some pretty weak communication skills and a crippling lack of charisma, versus the idealistic Jeremy Corbyn (he reminds me of my dad)

I still wonder if the Conservatives even want to win?  They don’t seem to?

Anyway a couple of things from today:

A foolish consultant who does not know that the social work department is inherently corrupt insisted on us having carers to help with my mother.  I realise those of you who do not understand what the social work department really do will think that this is a good thing, and that I should be grateful, but here is why it is just another way of ripping you off in much the same way as good old Theresa has tried to rip people off in the last week:

I managed my mother by myself through sundowning, through endless infections, through her own children trying to rob her.  Just before she went to hospital this time I was carrying her to the commode, letting her sit up for an hour when she could, she was washed and dressed at times to suit her and she could sleep when she wanted and chat at 4am whenever she felt like it.

Now that we have carers, I am a freak if I am not out of bed at 8 and feeding her, which means that I am not very happy or able to work as much at the moment, my sleep is destroyed, and she is noted as being inappropriately asleep if she is not wide awake right after her vat of porridge and honey.

They were brought in on the basis that it should take two to move her rather than me carrying her due to health and safety concerns.  The carers have refused to move her and have written off our handmade disabled chair as not suitable – they are now unable to rule it suitable without an expert decision so she is not allowed out of bed, putting her at risk of bedsores.

In addition, I have already been threatened/visited by the social work department who asked such delightful questions as

  • Does she even recognise you?
  • Who has power of attorney?
  • Can we use your toilet? (this last is used as an excuse to gain entrance to your house so the answer is no)

So we now have 4 visits of two people per day and she actually has less appropriate care, all in order to put us at risk from the local council.  People in nice houses do not invite the social work in, especially if they have been directly told by a social worker that the social work department are not there for the carer, they are there to gather evidence in order to seize the assets of the patient.

Naturally I am not impressed by this service and I am not sure why I am judged incompetent to wipe her bottom, since that is all that the carers actually do.

So, today they were asking about the carpet for Boris.  The nurse and the carers have separately expressed great interest in the carpet for Boris, so evidently this one is a winner.

How much are they?

Well, the last one I did was in Tatler, and it is nine and a half

Why is it worth that much?

Well you are paying for storage, the studio, the fact it is a niche product, twenty years of skill and the fact I need about 200kg of wool in stock to make a product like this, which has also cost every spare penny over the last 22 years because I refuse to ask for a grant for a creative wank, so to speak.

 

The other conversation I had was with my ex, who noted that I appear to be quite bright.

Men don’t listen at all, otherwise he would have given up years ago and I would have written a world shattering book.

Lack of confidence is tiresome.  Maybe it is time I tried staggering self belief.

 

Hey Theresa,

There aren’t sufficient care home owners in the UK to win the election for you on the basis of your dementia tax social care policy. And frankly, as a carer in a nice property, I cannot afford your corrupt system of social care as it is, never mind your diehard  conservative voters who will also be bullied repeatedly by the social work department.

Just sayin’

 

 

 

 

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