I told a very rich man he was worthless today. He laughed hysterically as if this could not possibly be true. He does not understand basic values. As such he is the poorest person I have ever met.
He has managed to get himself into a spot of bother here, as he does not understand the culture he has been living in for over a decade. He believes that people are taken in by his bonhomie. He is mistaken.
So that is how I have spent the last few weeks, providing friendship for someone who does not understand what it is, and providing free artwork for someone who neither understands nor values it. I have wasted time I could have spent on something worthwhile. I was mistaken.
Dem’s the breaks. In the meantime Little Shiva’s piece is going very well.
Well I appear to be heavily involved in doing some public work at last, so things are pretty busy at the moment.
Little Shiva, who is still watching the blog very closely despite my having selfishly neglected updating in ages, will be happy to know we are reaching the end of stage one of the chair. In a week or so I will be starting the next part, which is the shell. You are very loyal in your own funny way.
Then it will be the tongues, and the shell will take a couple of months to build. I also have to make the windows and find something for the base.
W0rking crazy hours at the moment and hoping to launch the superfood soon, although I will probably do it under another name.
Little Shiva has elected not to bother speaking, so I guess he intends to check the website daily forever whilst not having the balls to actually speak. You don’t either get what you want or move on that way, sorry.
The lining is now looking okay, although some adjustments to the base design will have to be made before waterproofing and preparing it for the windows.
I also have to do the tongues, which will take up quite a bit of time, and given the weight at this point, I think I will have to think quite carefully about where to resin it. I do not want it stuck in the studio forever because I cannot get it out of the door!
The base of the egg, which I will be working on from next week, is still in the early stages, and the carpet parts have not been done yet either, which is holding up other work as I want the chair to be the new centerpiece of the collections.
I still haven’t located something strong enough for the base of it. I will work on this once I am working less than 15 hours a day.
Still lonely. Time for a new direction. I have an excellent idea for a new story.
Well this last year has been quite educational. Only having spent much time with athiests I had not been around religious people much at all in recent years.
This year has changed all that, we have had the evil Hindu, who was actually the most morally upstanding of the three.
An immoral Christian, who apparently found it pleasant to attempt to commit adultery whilst telling me how inferior everyone else was.
A polygamist Muslim, as a person my favourite at the moment.
Of all of us, I with no practised religion, actually come out on top for moral behaviour, although it is interesting how Asian and Middle Eastern people see morality.
It all seems terribly Catholic to me, the idea that your fate is in God’s hands, so there is very little you can do about being a weak little human. Almost as if your religion is an excuse.
Oddly, in terms of doing the right thing, the evil Hindu wins. The Muslim, whilst a far nicer person, is more arty about it, finding flowery reasons for things that I can only dream about, and the Christian was a dismal failure.
For my next trick, I will be going out into the wider community for a large scale project designed to solve a number of problems at once. Ina will not be joining me on this trip, although I now have several useful skills.
I want to hear from Little Shiva aka Staring Brat 2. Inadisguise@mail.com or firstname.lastname@example.org. You don’t have to talk to me in person unless you want to.
I haven’t posted in what seems like ages. I have been worried about other things.
Work is going well in several respects and I am reasonably happy with direction at the moment.
Little Shiva’s chair is going very well, and I think the lining will be complete in the next two weeks or so. Many thanks to my sponsors for that.
I need to do a little bit of writing, and am about to do a large amount of research in and around the city. This should be interesting and the most organised piece of work I have done in a while.
I would like to speak to Staring Brat 2. I know this is highly unlikely, but recent events have shown me that I should request this anyway. The email is at the bottom of the page should he wish to get in touch.
Okay, I said I would write a post, and here it is.
Love is not what you think it is. I always wondered about traditional models of love, that of partnership, jealousy, possession, role playing etc and I did not like what I saw. It was not until I found my soulmate that I got to the bottom of it, in all respects. For those who want to read about that, the Best Scandal Ever Series is the direct route to thought process over about five years or so.
Wolfe was the perfect candidate because there was no danger of us getting together at that time because I was not developed enough to fully grasp the philosophy, despite living by it.
I was correct in my assumption, fairly early in life that what we think of as love starts with us wanting to have something in us that the other person has. That can be a characteristic, a quality, a perception. We thrive on learning, and so love occurs when we want to learn something from the other person.
What people often think of as love is the need to procreate, the desire for companionship, the drama of the day to day. None of these things are truly anything to do with love. That is to do with lack. Plato deals with this beautifully in the Symposium, video below although I seem to remember the 8th minute or so being significant.
I read this to death in my youth, so I am well acquainted with it.
Anyway, true love is about inspiration, it is not about being with the person at all. Thus my true love was Wolfe, a person I neither wanted to bother by actually being there, nor change. If you are fortunate enough to be with your inspiration, you then have to figure out how to be an equal partner in the force you create.
We are all forces of nature, and you choose the level of force you want to exude. I am capable of far more than I have been encouraged to expect, and so the aberration of falling in love with Wolfe on really very little input was about growth and potential, both his and mine.
What you need to get away from is the idea of togetherness. Togetherness is nothing to do with it. Looking at yourself and figuring out what you don’t have and the object of your affection does have makes the process far less tedious and far more rewarding. It also takes away issues of timewasting drama, ownership, jealousy and other more negative aspects of being in love.
You may find this a rather lonely way to look at it, but if you take this healthier view of what love is, it is far easier to lose the need for attachment.
Buddhists will tell you that it is not love, loss of love, end of love that causes unhappiness, it is attachment. If you remove the attachment from your feelings of love, you not only free yourself from unhappiness, you allow yourself to grow.
This is what I want you to do.
I want you to experience love without attachment. I want you to focus on what you feel you lack, and I want you to take the opportunity to learn about yourself. Stop thinking of it as a burning need, and start thinking of it as an opportunity.
As an example, despite trying to move on with life, I won’t stop loving Wolfe as long as I continue to grow, which is probably never, and even if it isn’t never, I will be eternally grateful for not being lonely any more. Neither he nor I have to actually do anything at all for that to be the case.
This does not mean I cannot love someone else, it means that the intangible exists. It does not involve emotional infidelity of any kind. Love is far bigger than almost all religions allow us to believe.
(FFS Wolfe, I’m weeping again. Hope I made a better job of it this time.)
That’s four in a row, and I think I will give up now.
Even after all that stress, Staring Brat 2 was still the most appropriate in terms of wit level and response.
Sigh. Shame on him.
I think I will stick to cats and making chairs. Very sad and weepy.
I have to work five jobs to avoid losing my income when some married dude goes mental and gets me fired. I’ve worked hard to get nowhere.
Developing some vegan fast food, building a management structure for a business, mentoring ten small businesses, taking on the troubleshooting for another international business for no money and developing Ina’s first shopfront, so quite busy just now. The chair is getting made whilst I work for another start up.
I’m fed up coming last. I’m a nice lady, I don’t deserve this BS.
I just heard on the grapevine that Staring Brat 2 is no longer in his job. Nothing to do with me, I did everything I could to remove the real culprit and make sure he was able to stay in that job so he could spend some quality time with his wife, who was also working up here.
I wonder what happened? It seems most unfair given that he did what he was told to do. That is a horrible company so he is better off out of it, to be honest.
Starting my new advisory thing tomorrow. Life is getting very complicated, but a lot more fun than it used to be.
Chair is going to be stunning, on the final stages of the first layer of the first internal structure. The lovely effusive man would like me to go and stitch in his cafe, but that is some time away so perhaps I will be making something else by that time as this chair is going to spend about six months hogging the studio when this bit is finished.
I hope Staring Brat 2 is okay and happier away from the horrific Staring Brat 1.
Today it has been intimated to me that I am now to offer mentoring services to business.
I am sure the recipients of my advice will be immensely surprised to speak to someone who has actually run a business, given that such advice is usually given by people who have never run a business in their lives. I am also hoping to be working with seniors fairly soon, in a more social capacity, but I have not heard back yet.
I am also going to be renegotiating with a couple of people I work with at present, as I am not interested in wasting my time pretending to be something I’m not to please anyone any more. Some things are worth doing and some are not.
I do not see why I should tolerate being on the receiving end of bad management any more when I am considerably more capable than they are.
Bumped into lovely effusive man last night. I must go and interfere with his cafe.
It wasn’t until I was applying the braid that features heavily in this latest artwork that I realised where I had seen the whiny little bitch lack of initiative of Staring Brat 2 before.
The reason he keeps reporting back to Staring Brat 1 – AKA the sadist from the story of the same name on the books page – is because he is ex army. There is a Colonel in the Indian Army with exactly the same name.
Another mystery solved, and the only way it even entered my head consciously is because I am making this chair.
I think I have finalised the name now, but other things are still developing. It remains a very angry piece of work, because I am very upset that people this disgusting exist, never mind that they are able to earn a living.
There are quite a few more things that I can do if I feel like it, because as long as they continue to act like this, people who are unfortunate enough to encounter them in the future are at risk from their delusional behaviour. If they wish to avoid this, I would suggest they find a different website to stare at.
The chair itself is looking fabulous, and it is looking very positive for a final result so far, although the weight is going to be a problem. (isn’t it always)
I am missing my walks, and I would like to move on to something constructive sooner rather than later, so I think another week or two and then I will possibly go and do some writing.
Also feeling rather fat, so I would like to recommence walking as soon as I can free up some time.